It beats…

I nudge myself its time to break out of the cocoon I have been hiding in for so long. When and how time flied by, I know not. The comfort zone seems  suicidal and yet I lie here undisturbed, untouched. The world around me keeps picking up its pace while I sit here all by myself and watch the world go faster and faster with each passing day. I m static. My entire entity seems to be at an uneasy rest. The static ness of  my existence is only contradicted by the beating rhythm of my heart, muffled under layers of thoughts, scars, indifference. It beats and beats silently, loudly, mildly and sometimes like a child at sleep.

The year is coming to an end. The mundane heartbeat calls out to me and I ignore it, enjoying the pleasantness of the quiet shell. It beats faster and louder, a bird calling for its flock. I pay no attention, though being at unease constantly. Time will pass as it is fading away now and the rhythms of my pumping organ will learn the boundaries of their new space. For what new will be achieved if I pay heed to the whispers of the one that carries the weight of my thoughts, the heaviness of my soul, the grief of that which has past, my many battered dreams it still nurtures… I think, yet I choose to be numb, indifferent, occupied by the facade of ‘doing something important’ .

One morning I found the rebellious heart nudging me more than ever. For a moment I felt it has escaped the confines of conformity, I felt helpless and powerless to find myself caught off guard. The rebel seemed to be the victor, leaving me behind, static and withered. The moment seemed to last forever until I realised that it was there, beating though rather harder than ever before. I took a deep breath to calm down the stressed muscles of the rebel. But I realise that it is perhaps too late. The damage is done beyond repair. It has truly been a victor, successfully pumping seeds of resistance throughout the complicated web inside, secretly using blood’s pathway…renewing strength, hope, life, freedom into the very pores of my existence…

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “It beats…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s