Longest post of year 2008

I have been playing around with words and juggling a plethora of random thoughts and emotions. its been almost a year. today i plan to write the longest post on my blog so far. what better way to leave behind a year and move on to the next with the longest post ever. Though to be honest i have absolutely no idea as to what this post is going to contain to qualify for the criteria.

The year was sometimes a battlefield of several untamed emotions, sometimes a smooth sailing through wild winds. there was a whirlpool of doubts and confrontations, overwhelming joy and sorrow. We have survived through all. However, life is not just about surviving. its about living right? I think this deserves a totally separate post someday.

For the time being i want to go on typing just for no reason at all. well there is this one target of making this the looooooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggest. ok i have mentioned this a couple of times now. the point and agenda established. right. period. silence.

Politically life for Pakistanis was a totally freaky roller coaster ride. some people on the ride enjoyed and shouted and screamed, others didnt feel that good and threw up. right now i hear a political talk show where a member of the parliament is saying “our government is in a period of transition”. such a long transition that has lasted for a year? and maybe even more….
One dictator left for he knew it was time to wash his uniform (any connection of the uniform to my magic shawl that needed a good washing?) After successfully pushing aside the uniform guy and providing him with a machine and surf excel another dictator stepped on stage, though without a uniform. that’s a good change for the eyes.

The t.v is still blaring with shouts and proclamations of we-saved-Pakistan politicians making huge statements and throwing sarcastic comments on their rivals. This will go on…while it is, a few “public service” messages these days are offering words of wisdom to us – we the lowly creatures with tiny brains incapable of adding 2 and 2 to make even 4. One advertisement that i happened to endure goes something like this.

Ap bijli bachayn tu yeh kissi zaroorat mand kay kaam aay/ if you save electricity, someone more needy might be able to benefit from your saving and i assume that that “needy” are some VIPs and the extravagant weddings they arrange for their sons and daughters with hundreds of bulbs lighting the tents and banquet halls.

another ad goes like this

“agar AP gas heaters ki jaga garam kapron ka istamal kerain tu hum gas bachaa saktay hain/ if you wear warm clothes instead of using heaters, we would be able to save more gas” yes the bad news is that we are running short on gas as well apart from water, electricity, fresh air, sensible politicians. Actually the latter is only a myth! sensible politicians? myth!

Conclusion to be drawn from the above examples of public service messages is:

  • Wear warm clothes, lots of them.
  • Avoid washing them (clothes) as much as possible. This will save you water and electricity both.
  • Dont take a bath everyday, save water. what? why are you so astonished? come on, dont you remember we are on a mission to save EVERYTHING since our poor country is on the verge of a terrible decline when it comes to basic necessities AND that responsibility of saving fall on US as well.
  • Don’t use heaters because that would lead to wastage of gas. Prefer dying of cold but no heaters.
  • If possible don’t use the stoves which means no cooking and no eating? and no geysers to be used either which equals to freezing cold water. How would one then shower with cold freezing water? oh well that problem has already been sorted out earlier – no bathing, remember? πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

The key words in the above points were AP (US. “us, we” not United States!) saving, and stop living. the last key word is hidden behind all the above, read between the lines or listen to everything being said in the ads/ public service messages.

warning: there are elements of extreme exaggeration in the above written post.
warning no 2: the post was written violating all the rules of living to be adopted by the people of Pakistan but you cannot sue me because we are not a rich country, only some of the humble politicians are and they are not our relatives. they would never give you money to sue me.
warning no 3: hahahahah, you can never sue me because we dont have a free judiciary.
warning no 4: dont tell me public service messages are about not smoking, not molesting the kids and not getting married.

p.s Just follow the instructions that are given on the tv ad/messages. All then we have to do is sit there quietly. And dont forget to switch off the t.v because THAT is wastage of electricity!

p.s the whole idea of the longest post got lost somewhere. i wanted to write about SO MANY other things!! Then again, i have to be a good Pakistani and follow what our public service messages tell us and obey them for the good of all. *angelic smile* thus i bid farewell to year 2008 with good intentions and bad actions. i promise to write long, short, sensible, nonsensical, happy, sad, good, bad, positive, negative posts here to entertain everyone who reads. The P.Ss
are not supposed to be THIS long!

Surviving through this post doesnt exempt you from reading my previous posts written in a frenzy. They have equal rights too! be kind. you there stop laughing! and you who is not able to appreciate a light humour, smile a little.


21 thoughts on “Longest post of year 2008

  1. I think Payara Pakistan need more Happy New Year than other league of nations.May her bad boys bygone this year!(trying to be politically correct)wasay,I was ready to read a really long post,thanks for warning in the begining!

  2. since nobody can comment on whats happenin in your post…why… why do you make all your posts so long ??? kia biggggarra hai hum ne 😦we r tryna save electricity here and u keep writin long posts 😦

  3. lol… those extravaganza weddings… so that’s the reason for all the loadshedding … makes sense πŸ™‚ yep, remeber the magic shawl very vividly… cud u still smell wonderful fruity fragrance from it ?

  4. MJ says:

    utp, hehehe i planned a LONG post, actually long, longer than my normally long posts as you mentioned so rightly :$ ehehedaanish, ameen to ur prayers πŸ˜‰Dee, now thats something new:D i am glad you found it long..my mission accomplished heheheheSeher, aw thankiii!beaugly, LOL… and i was abt to ask who is stinking here :psami, what do u mean nobody knows whats happening on my post? :$lolazra, i know, i kinda failed at my real attempt at that..my friend actually reminded me that i have written a LONGER post than this a few months back lolexquisite, welcome back! how are you feeling now? better health? aww thanks for remembering πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ hehehe well that shawl is in hiding from my mum right now, i did take it out for my prayers and yes,,the fruity scent is still there πŸ˜‰

  5. hey ur longest post is smth philosphical now be kind to that post n correct ur mistake!!the word is dont???loved it yara muahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh@ugly ducklingnow it wasnt that longggg

  6. Hey Mubi, best of luck for 2009, figured I’d let you know I started updating lahore daily photo again, thanks for your comments in my absence I hope to be able to keep up with it this time around.

  7. AA says:

    hehe..this is randomness at its best..you started with something else in your mind but somehow you ended writing something completely different:Pbtw i’m pretty sure that by <><>bajain<><> you mean’t <><>bachaen<><> isn’t it?<>*evil grin*<>

  8. MJ says:

    rebel, welcome back!!! its great to see you πŸ˜€illusion. LOL, thank you!! so someone did read the post carefully πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ haha @ evil grin :pbatster, welcome to the blog.hope to see you again πŸ™‚ hehe, thanks for liking!

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